The Penguins Inherit the Earth

Sometimes I love being a teacher. My wonderful students were assigned a short exercise in logic and reasoning - write a one page argument as to which country will take over the world. I stole this idea from another teacher (and current admin. Assistant) from Previous College. They brought in their arguments, read them in their groups, and each group picked a winner. Then each group presented their nominee for world domination after which they had they had the opportunity to rebut. At this point, decorum broke down and the whole "debate" became very much like teenagers arguing - which is of course exactly what it was. Now, after this, they voted as to which country reigned supreme.

In my first class, the countries that made it through the preliminaries were:

1. The Empire of America (After the U.S. has become an empire, they call on the aliens - which have been hidden by NASA and are allied with the Empire - and the superheroes to attack the rest of the world.)
2. The Penguin Nation of Antarctica (The human race will be wiped out in a major nuclear war, leaving Antarctica untouched since no humans live there. The penguins inherit the Earth.)
3. The Democratic Republic of Congo (They make the rubber for sneakers, and everyone needs sneakers. They will become rich as technology fails the rest of the world and their economies crumple.)
4. China (With their huge population, they have an endless supply of soldiers and can outlast any army. They have military bases all over the world cleverly disguised as Chinatowns. Chinese food vendors will give away bird flu infected chicken all over the world at a Chinese New Year's food expo/celebration.)

And the winner? The Penguin Nation of Antarctica. The only weakness to the penguin logic raised in class was that they could get the bird flu.

There were a couple of other clever arguments:

1. Tahiti (They have mermaids - I didn't hear all of this one, but I can imagine.)
2. The North Pole (Led by Super Santa - I didn't hear all of this one either, but it was presented with sound effects.)

In my second class, the nominees were:

1. America (Strong leadership, great inventors, and amazing athletes equals an unstoppable force.)
2. China (With their huge population and healthy eating habits, they will outlast us all.)
   
3. Switzerland (With chemically enhanced, extra yummy chocolate, the Swiss brainwash the rest of the world into submission.)

The winner? China. Healthy people don't eat chocolate.

The writers of the winning arguments were rewarded with their choice of M&Ms. Now I can only hope that tomorrow's students will be just as entertaining, and that all of them get the point to this exercise (Arguments need logical reasons to work.)